A Little Sugar in My Bowl

Ruby Bouie Johnson gathers wisdom from sexologists and sex therapists. “I want a little sugar In my bowl I want a little sweetness Down in my soul I could stand some lovin’ Oh so bad Feel so lonely and I feel so sad” Nina Simone There is an ache and ravenousness in music that expresses an […]

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The S Word

“You’re just a slut.” That’s the response I get when I describe my style of polyamory to people. I am not married and I don’t have any live-in partners. One of the reasons I have relationships is to have sex. I have both casual sex and sex in the context of committed relationships. In monogamous […]

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Stop Sharing Partners!

As the second eldest of eight children, I learned at an early age the importance of sharing. After a certain amount of children, we became a unit, a flock, a group, and were treated as such. That’s not to say our individuality was lost, but it can be quite expensive gifting and even treating a […]

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BDSM and Polyamory

Jai is back with her story of how BDSM and polyamory intersect. If you missed her first article, check out BDSM 101. I was introduced to both lifestyles relatively at the same time within my first Dominant/submissive relationship. My Sir and I talked a great amount about life and relationships in general. The topic of […]

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Black and Poly Dictionary

Confused about all the words used in the poly world? This comprehensive dictionary will help. Use your search function to find out definitions of unicorn, polyfidelity, womanist, and more! H/T to More Than Two, Joreth Innkeeper, Polyamory on Purpose, Kato Cooks and others for their work in compiling these terms. ABUNDANT LOVE: The belief or […]

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Finding Partners

A common question for those beginning a polyamorous relationship is: Where do I find partners? The answer is amazingly simple, but this post will break down the various ways you can find a new partner. In Person Just as if you were in a monogamous marriage, people find their partners at the places they go […]

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Ask Aunty: Black & What Now?

Ask Aunty is a regular feature of Black & Poly where real people ask about their polyamorous relationships. Aunty is here for you, so ask away! Dear Aunty, Why are there white people in the Black & Poly Facebook group? Black Nation Builder Dear Aunty, Why do the admins silence white voices in the Facebook group? […]

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Who is Black & Poly For?

A group members asks the Facebook group to be inclusive. Dear Black & Poly, can we visit or revisit the question of whether all black people should be allowed in this group? Recently, a post came up on our wall about whether it was appropriate to request a partner restrict dating to black people. While […]

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What If I Get Jealous?

It’s my right to be hellish. I still get jealous. -Nick Jonas, Jealous Jealousy is common in all human relationships, and if you’re transitioning into the poly world, you may wonder: how do I deal with jealousy? In this post, I’ll explain that polyamory is not about avoiding jealousy, but processing it in a healthy […]

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How to Date as a Couple

Many people who begin the polyamory journey are already married. A common assumption is that the best thing to do would be to date the same person (especially if it is a male/female couple). The poly community has a lot to say about this configuration, but below is a comprehensive guide to navigating this style […]

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